Explains a lot . . .

One that has been making the rounds of the Internet for ages but always funny! Thought I'd share.

****

A cowboy named Bud was overseeing his herd in a remote mountainous pasture
in California when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced out of a dust cloud
towards him.

The driver, a young man in a Armani suit, Gucci shoes, RayBan sunglasses and
YSL tie, leans out the window and asks the cowboy, "If I tell you exactly
how many cows and calves you have in your herd, Will you give me a calf?"

Bud looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his peacefully
grazing herd and calmly answers, "Sure, Why not?"

The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer,connects it
to his Cingular RAZR V3 cell phone, and surfs to a NASA page on the Internet
where he calls up a GPS satellite to get an exact fix on his location which
he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area in an
ultra-high-resolution photo.

The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop and exports it
to an image processing facility in Hamburg , Germany .. .Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot that the image has
been processed and the data stored. He then accesses a MS-SQL database
through an ODBC connected Excel spreadsheet with email on his Blackberry and
after a few minutes, receives a response.

Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-Tech
Miniaturized HP LaserJet printer and finally turns to the cowboy and says,
You have exactly 1,586 cows and calves."

"That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves," says Bud.

He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on amused as
the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car.

Then Bud says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you exactly what your
business is, will you give me back my calf?"

The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, "Okay, why not?"

"You're a Congressman for the U.S. Government", says Bud.

"Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, "but how did you guess that?"

"No guessing required." answered the cowboy. "You showed up here even though
nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already knew,to a
question I never asked. You tried to show me how much smarter than me you
are; and you don't know a thing about cows...this is a Herd of sheep. . . .
Now give me back my dog!

Husbands who work miracles . . .

My dryer is back to working order thanks to my husband who is up to any appliance challenge. A couple of hours of hands-on labor plus research on the Internet and my dryer is functioning again for the cost of $60 for parts. I think we got away a lot cheaper doing it ourselves and not calling a repairman and then waiting two days or more for him to show up.

I was twice as thankful today to pull the warm, softly scented laundry from the depths of the dryer. Waiting two days for laundry to dry on the line during a damp season just wasn't working for me.

My husband is very good about tackling new repair problems. He is one of those people who ALWAYS read the directions first. Just shows me that opposites DO attract! When he wants to do a task, he does the research and is more often than not, very successful.

Somone told me that I am able to cook and bake because my mother knew how to cook and bake. Always seems to take away from my kitchen conquests. When it comes to the kitchen, I was pretty much a novice but knew how to read a cookbook. Like my husband, when I want to do something, I look it up.

Another storm coming in this evening but I'm okay with that. MY DRYER WORKS!

Covering all the bases . . .

Whenever I put a load of laundry in the washer, I always pray a thank you that the hardest part of the job is putting the laundry in and and taking it out. Sure beats pounding dirty clothing on a rock by a creek. Besides, finding a creek in California isn't that easy with a drought. Got reminded that I might remember to send up a thank you for the benefits of a dryer, too.

Just as my husband drove off to work, yesterday, after having repaired the automatic gargage door opener, the dryer went into spin mode while emitting very loud BUMP/CLUNK noises. I hastily stopped it and decided the better course of action would be hanging up the damp clothes and waiting for my husband's return from work. After all, what husband wouldn't be pleased with yet another breakdown of household equipment on the same day?

Although our week of rain had let up, it was a very cold day yesterday and a garage isn't the best place to get a whole load of clothes dry. Once the dryer gets fixed, I will double my laundry prayers to include it. Finding a patch of clean, dry grass in a sunny place to dry ones clothing is as hard as finding that laundry rock in a creek. Another way for God to remind us to pray because you tend to not appreciate your blessings until they go on a short vacation!

Rainy Day Projects and Discoveries . . .

I was working on a quilt yesterday and found a pattern for an 'organized' scrap quilt. I made a test square to see how easy/good/attractive it was and was delighted to find it a simple pattern that looked complicated! My favorite kind of outcome. Sigh . . . Although I'd like to immediately cut out all my scrap fabric and get started on this find, I'm being good and completing the two currently in the works. Being a grown up isn't all that fun when you are trying to be practical!

I've been perusing old cookbooks lately. One was given to me by a now unremembered source. I finally took the time to check it out and was pleased to find THREE childhood baking memories in it, recipes I have wished I could find for ages. Very nostalgic going through these cookbooks and they hark back to a simpler time when Moms put some happy time into their kitchen production and felt it WAS worth their time to be a Mom in all aspects.

I just baked a recipe out of one of the books. It is cooling on the counter and I have to say, it was an easy to assemble recipe with little worry or angst involved. It's a keeper.

Fudge Cake
1 3/4 cups all-purpose flour
2 cups granulated sugar
2 teaspoons baking powder
1 teaspoon salt
1/4 cup shortening
1 1/2 cups milk
2 teaspoons vanilla extract
2 eggs
4 squares unsweetened baking chocolate (4 ounces)- melted and cooled slightly
1 cup chopped nuts (your choice and optional)

Preheat oven to 350 degrees

Grease and flour two layer cake pans, 8 inches. Measure flour, sugar, baking power, soda, and salt into mixer bowl. Add shortening, milk, and vanilla. Beat for approximately two minutes. Scrape down sides and bottom of bowl. Add eggs and chocolate. Beat another two minutes, scraping bowl frequently. Stir in nuts. Pour int prepared pans. Bake 35-40 minutes or until top springs back when lightly pressed. Cool before frosting.

Anyone looking for a good fudge frosting, let me know!

When it rains . . .

According to the weather reports, California is supposed to get more than a week of rain up to 16 inches! I have found that when the news gets ahold of the weather, it doesn't happen. We do need rain in order to cope with the dry, summer months so I'm hoping God provides us with rain in 'due abundance' meaning, we don't want to build another ark just dampen down the earth and replenish our water supplies.

Although we can't vote in the senate election happening on Tuesday in Massachusetts, we should keep the end result in our sincerest prayers. The election of the Republican candidate could be the turning vote on obamacare IF they can do it in spite of the dirty politics of the Democrats. No, the Republican candidate isn't perfect but it would be historic to break the Democratic hold on that state and open it up to real change.

Don't forget Haiti! Besides our parishes, there are many good charities out there collecting for Haiti. Food for the Poor said that a mere donation of $12 could feed a family of four for a month. I know that this would be difficult for us to do it here which shows how much we have and how little the people of Haiti NEED to survive.

Tricked into creativity . . .

Although I possess a copy of Julia Child's "Mastering the Art of French Cooking", I have never really read it other than to get cooking hints or ideas. I watched Julie and Julia last night and have now been browsing seriously through this book. In fact, there is one of her beef recipes simmering in the oven right now!

I selected this recipe to try because it was featured in the movie and was made to look relatively easy. The movie didn't depict the part that said it was really three recipes in one with a lot of prep work. The smell wafting from the oven are proving to be worth the time, however. It also taught me to read through the entire recipe TWICE to insure I have all the steps and sub-recipes in order.

Actually, is spite of the busy work with the two, extra steps, the recipe was pretty straight forward and easy to follow. It is amazing how Julia Child has taken the heights of French cooking and put them into an obtainable format.

If you are interested . . .

I now have a Yahoo Group set up. If you are interested in joining and sharing thoughts more instantly and widely, subscribe to Catholicsathome-subscribe@yahoogroups.com.

Prayer for our country . . .

Just after 9/11, someone posted a prayer that I have kept in my prayerbook ever since. It was for the protection of our country from terrorists. After the political outrages of the last year, it would seem that a lot of our terrorist activity is within our system and proposed and acted upon by the politicians elected to office to represent us. Funny how the majority of citizens are in favor of one thing yet our politicians follow their own agenda. Here is that prayer which now has a dual purpose - for both foreign terrorists and the domestic ones. Contrary to the political popular belief, it is not the Christian faction that are the domestic terrorists!

O Jesus, Divine Redeemer, be merciful unto us and the whole world. Amen.

O Powerful God! O Holy God! O Immortal God have pity on us, and on all that are in the whole world. Amen.

Pardon and mercy, O my Jesus during these present dangers, pour on us Thy most Precious Blood. Amen.

O Eternal Father be merciful to us, by the Blood of Jesus Christ, Thy only Son, be merciful to us, we beseech Thee. Amen. Amen. Amen.

Happy with my job . . .

Probably due to remembering all my vitamins, yesterday was a pretty good day. It was also get ready for pay day shopping day so I excavated the refrigerator to see what was past it's due date and what could crawl out on it's own. I seem to have gotten a handle on getting items used up in a timely manner because all I found was milk approaching it's demise and some aging apricots. I went into homemaking gear and turned the still-good milk into Greek carmel cream and the apricots returned as a mousse. It felt good to not only refrain from wasting food but to turn it into a treat for the family.

I think attitude has a lot to do with how we face our homemaking portion of life. If we walk into the kitchen and dread every step that brings us near the stove and meal preparation, we aren't going to do a very good job. I have always told my children that doing their school work is their job and do it like they were getting paid for it. Later, I realized that I had to take that very same advice to heart in being a homemaker. After all, my husband is working so I can stay home with the children. The least I can do is make sure he has a comfortable home to relax in when he comes home!

And, like any job in life, the more you do it with a glad heart, the more you like the process and results. I stopped looking at cooking as a chore, years ago. When you think about it, you can fix what you like and still get compliments on the meal! A win/win situation! As with most mandatory projects, you start researching for better ways to do your job and before you know it, you look forward to providing the family with great meals and the work gets to be part of the pleasure.

A side benefit of enjoying your time in the kitchen is that you learn to be frugal and still present good food. You start avoiding the frozen, precooked stuff and WANT to make really homemade food for your family. My 'hobby' in long check out line at the grocery store is checking out everyone else's grocery cart and figuring out what they wssted their money on and how they could have shopped (to my mind!) more productively. My weekly report card is how much I saved at the grocery store. My real reward is the smile on my husband's face when he comes home from work and sees a healthy but tasty meal on the table. My husband leads the Grace Before Meals and it is always with a sincere heart. I like the "A" for effort I get on that report card!

Freedom . . . sort of . . .!

Tuesday is our day off from daily Mass. I have a devout altar boy son who gets up six days of the week to serve Mass and he really needs that one morning to sleep in and vegetate a bit. It also gives me that one day of the week to really get some housecleaning done so I will not feel guilty when I sit down to my sewing machine.

I cut out a definite pattern type project for quilting yesterday. I guess I'm not a stay-in-the lines sort of person. I used enough fabric to see how one pieced square would look and I didn't like it. I put it aside and with the same, chosen fabrics, I went my usual route and made it up as I went along. I finished the piecing today and when I arranged my quilt squares, it was nice to see that in the midst of my abstract ways, there was an interesting pattern midst the odd choices.

It is always interesting to see how a piece of fabric that doesn't look like it will really fit into the overall pattern turns out to be the turning point of the whole patten. It happens often so I never restrain my instincts. Sort of reminds me of the self-centered world of today where unwanted babies are thought to not 'fit in' and are disposed of without a qualm. It makes me kind of wonder how their life might have been a turning point in the whole pattern of life.

Intellectual Interlude for today . . .

"The main dangers in this life are the people who want to change everything - or nothing. "
-- Nancy Astor

"We rarely think people have good sense unless they agree with us."
-- Francois de La Rochefoucauld

"Today you can go to a gas station and find the cash register open and the toilets locked. They must think toilet paper is worth more than money."
-- Joey Bishop

"I have come to the conclusion that politics are too serious a matter to be left to the politicians."
-- Charles De Gaulle

Enough said . . .

"If you are not criticized, you may not be doing much."
-- Donald H. Rumsfeld

A must read find from the Internet . . . YOU have been warned!

And so it came to pass in the Age of Insanity that the people of the land called America, having lost their morals, their initiative, and their will to defend their liberties, chose as their Supreme Leader that person known as "The One." He emerged from the vapors with a message that had no meaning; but He hypnotized the people telling them, "I am sent to save you. My lack of experience, my questionable ethics, my monstrous ego, and my association with evil doers are of no consequence. I shall save you with hope and Change. Go, therefore, and proclaim throughout the land that he who proceeded me is evil, that he has defiled the nation, and that all he has built must be destroyed." And the people rejoiced, for even though they knew not what The One would do, he had promised that it was good; and they believed. And The One said "We live in the greatest country in the world. Help me change everything about it!" And the people said, "Hallelujah! Change is good!" Then He said, "We are going to tax the rich fat-cats." And the people said, "Sock it to them!" "And redistribute their wealth." And the people said, "Show us the money!" And then he said, "redistribution of wealth is good for everybody." And Joe the plumber asked, "Are you kidding me? You're going to steal my money and give it to the deadbeats?" And The One ridiculed and taunted him, and Joe's personal records were hacked and publicized. One lone reporter asked, "Isn't that Marxist policy?" And she was banished from the kingdom! Then a citizen asked, "With no foreign relations experience and having zero military experience or knowledge, how will you deal with radical terrorists?" And "The One" said, "Simple. I shall sit with them and talk with them and show them how nice we really are; and they will forget that they ever wanted to kill us all!" And the people said, "Hallelujah!! We are safe at last, and we can beat our weapons into free cars for the people!" Then The One said, "I shall give 95% of you lower taxes." And one, lone voice said, "But 40% of us don't pay ANY taxes." So The One said, "Then I shall give you some of the taxes the fat-cats pay!" And the people said, "Hallelujah! Show us the money!" Then The One said, "I shall tax your Capital Gains when you sell your homes!" And the people yawned, and the slumping housing market collapsed. And He said, "I shall mandate employer-funded health care for every worker and raise the minimum wage. And I shall give every person unlimited healthcare and medicine and transportation to the clinics!" And the people said, "Give me some of that!" Then he said, "I shall penalize employers who ship jobs overseas." And the people said, "Where's my rebate check?" Then The One said, "I shall bankrupt the coal industry and electricity rates will skyrocket!" And the people said, "Coal is dirty, coal is evil, no more coal! But we don't care for that part about higher electric rates." So The One said, "Not to worry. If your rebate isn't enough to cover your expenses, we shall bail you out. Just sign up with ACORN and your troubles are over!" Then He said, "Illegal immigrants feel scorned and slighted. Let's grant them amnesty, Social Security, free education, free lunches, free medical care, bilingual signs and guaranteed housing..." And the people said, "Hallelujah!" and they made him king! And so it came to pass that employers, facing spiraling costs and ever-higher taxes, raised their prices and laid off workers. Others simply gave up and went out of business, and the economy sank like unto a rock dropped from a cliff. The banking industry was destroyed. Manufacturing slowed to a crawl. And more of the people were without a means of support. Then The One said, "I am the 'the One'--The Messiah--and I'm here to save you! We shall just print more money so everyone will have enough!" But foreign trading partners said unto Him, "Hold on. Your dollar is not worth a pile of camel dung! You will have to pay more." And others in the world agreed and said, "Neither are all these idiotic programs you have embraced. Lo, you have become a Socialist state and a second-rate power. Now you shall play by our rules!" And the people cried out, "Alas, alas!! What have we done?" But yea verily, it was too late. The people set upon The One and spat upon him and stoned him, and his name was dung. And the once mighty nation was no more; and the once-proud people were without sustenance or shelter or hope. And the change The One had given them was as like unto a poison that had destroyed them and like a whirlwind that consumed all that they had built. And the people beat their chests in despair and cried out in anguish, "Give us back our nation and our pride and our hope!!" But it was too late, and their homeland was no more. You may think this a fairy tale, but it's not. It's happening RIGHT NOW.

Addiction covered . . .!

After a long flight home from seeing his family on the East Coast, my husband's idea of a restful next day was to treat me to a trip to my favorite fabric warehouse. I haven't cut a single quilt square for a month and am looking forward to doing so as soon as possible!

Although I can find designer fabrics in the reduced price section of the warehouse, I kind of yearn to be so wealthy that I can go for the six and eight dollar a yard stuff at the front of the store. How come their colors always seem brighter? It is not like I'm not getting fabric by the same designers in the reduced section.

My favorite part of shopping for fabric is the 'stack' section where they have flat fold fabric piled about five-feet high. You spend enough time going through the fabric and you can often find something for $1.98 that is the same as the stuff on the bolts going for more. My husband initially laughed when I said I can find my favorite designers by 'feel'. He has seen me do it too often now to doubt me anymore. Cheap fabric feels cheap.

I did my husband a usual kindness. His only request when we go to the fabric warehouse is that it all fits in my cupboards. Fortunately, I used a lot of my current stash on Christmas gift quilts and easily replenished the shelves and managing to get the doors shut, too.

Our self-centered world . . .

On the news, they were showing a driving simulation test with the express purpose of revealing the extent cell phone use effects your driving ability. The news woman trying out the test was amazed to find out that every time she answered a cell phone, the car swerved noticeably. Granted, most times a swerve is easily corrected but what about another car along side that is forced to move because of your sudden change of direction?

Made me think about how many people, here in California, still regularly use their cell phones even though it is against the law. No matter what anyone says, cell phones are a distraction and your driving is not one hundred percent. It is the ego centered world of today where everyone thinks they are an exception.

New Year thoughts for the day . . .

"Human salvation lies in the hands of the creatively maladjusted."
-- Martin Luther King Jr.

"You don't have to suffer to be a poet; adolescence is enough suffering for anyone."
-- John Ciardi

"If God had really intended men to fly, he'd make it easier to get to the airport."
-- George Winters

"Things are only impossible until they're not."
-- Jean-Luc Picard

Happy New Year!

A quote that reflects a possible New Year's Resolution?

"I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by."
-- Douglas Adams