A messy kitchen is a happy kitchen and this kitchen is delirious.
No husband has ever been shot while doing the dishes.
A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand.
A clean house is a sign of a misspent life.
Housework done properly can kill you.
Countless numbers of people have eaten in this kitchen and gone on to lead normal lives.
My next house will have no kitchen . . . just vending machines.
Monday, October 17, 2011
Church Bulletin Bloopers . . .
Bloopers from church bulletins . . .
The pastor would appreciate if the ladies of the congregation would lend him their electric girdles for the pancake breakfast next Sunday morning.
The audience is asked to remain seated until the end of the recession.
The eighth graders will be presenting Shakespeare’s Hamlet in the church basement at noon, Friday at 7 p.m. The congregation is invited to attend this tragedy.
Eight new choir robes are currently needed, due to the addition of several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.
The pastor would appreciate if the ladies of the congregation would lend him their electric girdles for the pancake breakfast next Sunday morning.
The audience is asked to remain seated until the end of the recession.
The eighth graders will be presenting Shakespeare’s Hamlet in the church basement at noon, Friday at 7 p.m. The congregation is invited to attend this tragedy.
Eight new choir robes are currently needed, due to the addition of several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.
Odd . . . but, perhaps not . . .
Initially, the idea of using pumpkin in barbecue sauce sounded very weird. After thinking about it, it may be just the thing to add some depth of flavor without making it taste like really bad pumpin pie filling!
Barbeque Sauce with Pumpkin
1 cup tomato sauce
3/4 cup canned pumpkin
1/4 cup cider vinegar
1/4 cup brown sugar
1 onion, finely chopped
2 tablespoons dijon-type mustard
1 teaspoon Chinese hot mustard powder
2 tablespoons olive oil
1 heaping tablespoon chili powder
1 generous pinch of chili flakes
5 cloves of garlic, peeled, smashed, and minced
1/2 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon liquid smoke seasoning
With a bit of oil, quickly cook the garlic and onion until it is tender but not brown. Add the rest of the ingredients and stir together to combine. Simmer on low for 15-20 minutes. Use it to baste pork, beef or chicken. Do this during the last 15-20 minutes of cooking time so it doesn't burn.
The more I read this recipe, the better it sounds! Serve this sauce on your favorite meat and pile it on a side dish of steamed rice.
Barbeque Sauce with Pumpkin
1 cup tomato sauce
3/4 cup canned pumpkin
1/4 cup cider vinegar
1/4 cup brown sugar
1 onion, finely chopped
2 tablespoons dijon-type mustard
1 teaspoon Chinese hot mustard powder
2 tablespoons olive oil
1 heaping tablespoon chili powder
1 generous pinch of chili flakes
5 cloves of garlic, peeled, smashed, and minced
1/2 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon liquid smoke seasoning
With a bit of oil, quickly cook the garlic and onion until it is tender but not brown. Add the rest of the ingredients and stir together to combine. Simmer on low for 15-20 minutes. Use it to baste pork, beef or chicken. Do this during the last 15-20 minutes of cooking time so it doesn't burn.
The more I read this recipe, the better it sounds! Serve this sauce on your favorite meat and pile it on a side dish of steamed rice.
Fun and wisdom in the same quotes . . .
"Read, every day, something no one else is reading. Think, every
day, something no one else is thinking. Do, every day, something no one else
would be silly enough to do. It is bad for the mind to be always part of
unanimity."
-- Christopher Morley
-- Christopher Morley
"We are confronted with insurmountable opportunities."
-- Walt Kelly
-- Walt Kelly
"I do not have a psychiatrist and I do not want one, for the
simple reason that if he listened to me long enough, he might become disturbed."
-- James Thurber
-- James Thurber
"Man is tormented by no greater anxiety than to find someone
quickly to whom he can hand over that great gift of freedom with which the
ill-fated creature is born."
-- Fyodor Dostoevsky
-- Fyodor Dostoevsky
The computer age is aging me!
Although my son registered for community college for the Fall semester, because of state and government cuts, he couldn't get in with any and every class we tried. We went to the counseling office and they gave him an assessment test and said he would have to re-register on this date for the Spring semester. I got up early, skipped my exercise, skipped my breakfast which meant I couldn't take my vitamins and . . . nothing! I went to the registration site and got it filled out and they came back with a huge red error code - someone with that name is already in the system. Uh, yeah, I know but he never got to be a student so why won't the computer take my re-registration information. I then spent a 'wonderful' hour trying to figure out what they wanted. Eventually, they blocked me for making too many enters into the system . . . and no registration.
We had hopes of jumping on this early because our registration determines the day we can apply for classes, the earlier the better. Looks like we are heading for end of the line, again. My husband is going to the school this morning with hopes of straightening it out. My son says he will take just about any class available but refuses to even consider ballet or fashion design! Go figure! :-)
Meanwhile there are daily radio commercials from the community college advertising financial help, career help, etc., yet many freshmen were turned away because of cutbacks. You'd think they'd pull the commercials given that reality.
Off to Mass with hopes of reducing my stress and lowering the volume of my rants!
We had hopes of jumping on this early because our registration determines the day we can apply for classes, the earlier the better. Looks like we are heading for end of the line, again. My husband is going to the school this morning with hopes of straightening it out. My son says he will take just about any class available but refuses to even consider ballet or fashion design! Go figure! :-)
Meanwhile there are daily radio commercials from the community college advertising financial help, career help, etc., yet many freshmen were turned away because of cutbacks. You'd think they'd pull the commercials given that reality.
Off to Mass with hopes of reducing my stress and lowering the volume of my rants!
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