"Everybody hates me because I'm so universally liked."
-- Peter de Vries
"As a matter of principle, I never attend the first annual anything."
-- George Carlin
"Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to learn from the experience of others, are also remarkable for their apparent disinclination to do so."
-- Douglas Adams
"A lot of fellows nowadays have a B.A., M.D., or Ph.D. Unfortunately, they don't have a J.O.B."
-- Fats Domino
