1. Get everyone longer jeans and skirts to cover mismatched socks.
2. Better yet, get everyone beige socks.
3. Coordinate children’s clothing to match the main meal of the day; red - spaghetti, brown - stew, etc.
4. Make safety pins a fashion statement.
5. Let dog and cat in the house just before short-notice guests arrive and blame the animals for any clutter.
6. Ban socks and promote sandals during the summer.
7. Go ahead and wash all the whites with that one red sweatshirt and avoid the suspense of when will it happen.
8. Explain away cobwebby corners as unit studies in process on arachnids.
9. Keep outside of closet doors scrubbed, cleaned and never open them when anyone outside the family is in the house.
10. Never date the messages written in dust.
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